I can't speak highly enough about this:

Every time the Nationals' do well with their gloves, the speakers play sounds from the Original Super Mario. It's terrific. If only this was RBI Baseball and - 

Oh my god, this play has to be seen to be believed.

LaRoche the second on first, Jackie Wilson at the plate, Wilson knocks a liner down the left-field line, Adam Dunn retrieves the ball and hurls it: Ryan Zimmerman, Gunshow Ronnie Belliard and Jewish Guzman all standing at third base, all three stare at the ball as it rolls between them from Dunn, and LaRoche the second scores easily, Jackie Wilson slides needlessly into third, and Ryan, Gunshow and Jewish all turn back to see Jackie dusting himself off. I probably shouldn't be talking, for I stared just as dumbly at the play.

President's Race. All four presidents walking hand-in-hand with the pepperoni's-'scuse me-Perogies or whatever. One of the Perogies, whose name, I think, is Maholo Jalapeno', walks with a purse on one arm and one of those four, even-more dead presidents. Teddy off to the lead, then gets punched in the gut by the Geico Gecko.  The Presidents' race has dissolved into an MMA Match, the Goodwill Games and a Dali' painting all rolled into one. It would have made more sense for Screech the Eagle to shoot Lincoln in the back of the head with an exploding sausage while on a segway.

Sic Semper Tyrannis!

Nothin' doin', top of the fifth, Arr! Mateys ahead by a run, 1-0. Nyjer Morgan pops out, Ol' Fred Sanchez flies to the Maxican. Nate McLouth, whad'dya got?

First pitch...Strike 1

this is something!

Pitch two...Hit McLouth in the shoulder.

Jesus.

Craig Monroe at the plate

Knocks it right to Zimmerman, who pops it up fifteen yards into the air. Why?

LaRoche the first grounds to Gunshow.  Thank you for ending that inning.

Time for a smoke.  Sorry, Kiss Cam.