Tales of Funny pictures

So the "Nick's Sausage Segway Squad" came out at the end of the second inning on Segway Scooters and shot hot sausage into the crowd. This made me think of other practical uses for electric transportation. I realize quickly that no transport will move as briskly and as often as a baseball lineup facing a bad pitcher, and that got me thinking about the Bailouts. Now these companies have failed. FAILED, and so the last administration and this administration both decide to pour money into those banks anyway, rather than let the house of cards fall to the peanut shells below. I have to stress that I worked for Obama as a lowly canvasser, and I believe he's great, but enfranchising anti-accountability is so ethically short-sighted...all this has to do with baseball somehow. I just know it.

This is unsound because it's bad baseball logic, that we find ourselves following again. Why give bad pitchers contracts? It hurts!

It is as I say this that, Ryan Howard launches Sputnik off of Mr. Cabrera. Phils lead, 3-1.

Oh, and here are some embarrassing pictures of our beloved mascots. Our FIVE mascots:

Below is the coup de grace. The main photo is of Screech, the Nats Mascot. The inset is of the pre-Screech, when they were designing the mascot, knowing that it would be an eagle. They didn't have a design down yet, so they decided to just throw an egg out there to run around the stands, to both stall and build anticipation. This information is mostly fictional, although I'm sure there's truth to it, but the fact is that for a few Dali-esque months in the Summer of '05, there was a giant egg running around Washington D.C. promoting baseball.

Sometimes you have to break a few eggs to make vomit?

Ah, here's the president's race now. George in the lead

There's some dude in the race. What, that person's not a president!

What the hell? 

Oh, it was a Phillie fan, and he of long hair lost to Abe Lincoln. I'm sure he was paid to lose, but Jesus, I hear kids saying that things like "Lincoln's not aerodynamic" and "horse**it."